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So THAT'S where the pond scene came from!

September 26, 2006
by

Alert Janeite Sarah wrote to tell us that Jane Austen was featured on the “Ruth Harrison, Reference Librarian” skit during the radio show A Prairie Home Companion this past weekend.

TK: OK, Miss Harrison. See you tomorrow. — (DOOR OPENS, CLOSES). (SHE DRAWS A SIGH OF RELIEF) (FOOTSTEPS) At last. I’m alone. Free. Free to work on my novel. Broken Bindings. (FOOTSTEPS, CUPBOARD DOOR OPENS, GLASS IS SET ON TABLE. LIQUID IS POURED IN. RUTH SIPS FROM IT. SHE SIGHS.) Oh my, that surely hits the spot.

TR (BRIT LADY): You should lock the library door, Ruth.

SS: (GASP) It’s — it’s the picture of Jane Austen on the wall — and her lips are moving.

TR (BRIT LADY): Of course they’re moving, Ruth. I’m talking to you. Pour me some of that sherry.

SS: Sherry??? Miss Austen— I can’t believe you’re saying that.

TR (BRIT LADY): When I wrote “Pride and Prejudice,” I was higher than a kite. Good and tanked up on port wine. I drank it by the pitcher.

SS: By the pitcher???

TR (BRIT LADY): In the unexpurgated version, Mr. Darcy had the body of a young elk and we cavorted together. An editor took out the cavorting. That’s what killed me. Not consumption.

SS: Miss Austen, this is so unlike you—

TR (BRIT LADY): What do you mean? You expected me to be all buttoned-up just because I’m a spinster?? Wearing a frumpy dress with high necklines and a bonnet? Ha. This is the real me. (ZIP, PLOP)

SS: Oh my gosh—

TR (BRIT LADY): This red satin blouse too much for you, Ruth?

SS: You forgot to button it, Miss Austen.

TR (BRIT LADY): I like it like that. And the leopardskin pillbox hat.

SS: So is platinum blonde your real hair color ?

TR (BRIT LADY): Today it is. I’m my own woman, Ruth. And you are, too. You just have to be strong. Just be strong, Ruth. Be strong…..(DISSOLVING DREAMSTATE)

SS (DREAMY): Be strong….be strong…..be strong.

We laugh, but wasn’t that version of P&P published recently?

You can listen to the episode online (must have evil Real Player, boo hiss) or read the transcript.

Leave a Comment
  1. Jessica Irene permalink
    September 26, 2006 2:39 pm

    Would love to see Jane and Stephen Maturin drinking claret together whilst writing in their diaries. “Another sip of laudanum, Miss Austen?”

  2. September 26, 2006 10:32 pm

    “Miss Austen, you have debauched my sloth!”

    (Hey, somebody had to say it.)

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